8/11/12

Star Trek: Asterisk "The Infinite Vulcan"

Vital Information
Series: The Animated Series
Episode: S01E07
Air Date: October 20, 1973
Written by: Walter Koenig
Directed by: Hal Sutherland

Premise
Spock is captured by a dude who thinks he can make Spock into a master race. Oh, and there are plant-men.

Review
So the Enterprise visits the planet Phylos and while they're looking around, Sulu comes across a weird species of planet life that unroots itself, walks around and then digs back into the ground. Kinda cute - like a planty tribble. Should be no tribble at all. But then Sulu passes out from the plant's poison. And then the away team meets the planet's inhabitants: plant creatures who know exactly how to cure Sulu. How, you may ask? Because they've met a human before. And it's their master.

Their master turns out being a clone of Dr. Stavos Keniclius who was a geneticist in the Eugenics Wars. His thing was that he wanted to clone the perfect specimen to create a Master Race. Anyway, while the away team is busy exploring, they are attacked by plant pterodactyls with grabby tendrils. They hold the rest of the away team still while capturing Spock. And then the main plant dudes are like, "sorry, bros, but we had to keep you occupied while we kidnapped your Vulcan. You can go back to your ship now."
"So, um... I have this thing where I have to sleep
with a member of every species I meet..."
So, then they meet Keniclius 5, the fifth clone of the "good" doctor. And Keniclius 5 explains that Spock is the most perfectest specimen he has ever come across and he wants to make an army of Spocks. Oh, did I mention that Keniclius is just under 21 feet tall? Yeah, he's a giant. Also, it turns out that when Dr. Stavos Keniclius came to the planet he carried a disease that wiped out most of the plant people, so now, aside from his main goal of making a master race, he's also trying to save the plant-men.

Well, then we meet what his plans are for Spock: a giant clone of the Vulcan first officer. He's kind of a little brain dead at the moment, though, because he's still processing all the information that was in original Spock's brain. Oh, and they can't copy that information. They have to move it. Yeah, original Spock is going to be a vegetable on a planet full of plant-men.
Also, the plant-men like to play pool on their science tables.
Well, Kirk will have none of this. So, he uses a special secret weapon to defeat all the plant creatures. Round-Up! *WHIPA* The away team sprays the place down with weed-killer and all the plant creatures are disabled. All that's left is to convince Keniclius 5 that he has a bad idea. Which is perfect, because he happened to clone a Vulcan. The Vulcan symbol is the IDIC, Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations, which stands for the universal idea of beauty. Therefore, an army of Spocks would never agree that such an army should exist. They're all just too much alike.  So, Big Spock uses the Vulcan Mind ~Touch~ to put his brain back inside Little Spock, and now both Spocks are fully operational.

But now Keniclius 5 is all bummed that his life's work is now ruined and he has nothing to do. But, oh, wait, he wiped out almost an entire race. He could totally help them get back on their feet! And Big Spock could help him! So now somewhere out there in the galaxy there is a gigantic clone of Spock helping a gigantic clone of a Eugenics War-era doctor to repopulate a planet full of intelligent plant life. The End.

Overall Thoughts
...Really? ...I mean, really?? I'm just going to go with the idea that after 5 generations, Keniclius isn't that bright anymore. I mean, the original Keniclius never thought of cloning a Vulcan? Nor did any of the following Keniclius clones? Nice try, Walter Koenig, but maybe you should just stick to Chekov.